Have you ever prayed that prayer? It's not a natural cry. It doesn't seem to flow easily from our human hearts. It's terrifying, really. Terrifying...yet completely and purely sweet.
This song by Sidewalk Prophets has been on repeat on my iPhone and in my mind lately...
"Keep Making Me"
Make me broken
So I can be healed
'Cause I'm so calloused
And now I can't feel
I want to run to You
With heart wide open
Make me broken
Make me empty
So I can be filled
'Cause I'm still holding
Onto my will
And I'm completed
When you are with me
Make me empty
[Chorus:]
'Til You are my one desire
'Til You are my one true love
'Til You are my breath, my everything
Lord, please keep making me
Make me lonely
So I can be Yours
'Til I want no one
More than You, Lord
'Cause in the darkness
I know You will hold me
Make me lonely
[Chorus]
'Til You are my one desire
'Til You are my one true love
'Til You are my breath, my everything
Lord, please keep making,
I know You'll keep making
Lord, please keep making me
I so desperately want this to be my prayer.
I so want this to be my heart.
Every word of this song is what I've been battling with for days, months, YEARS.
My God, please keep making me...
"But you, O LORD, are a shield about me, my glory, and the lifter of my head. I cried aloud to the LORD, and he answered me from his holy hill." ~Psalm 3:3-4
This song is one that resonates so deeply with me lately. I can't get enough of it. I sing it. I shout it. I pray it. God has used it to touch my heart and grant me peace, so I want to share it with all of you. The lyrics are in bold, my comments are italicized. The music video is below.
Help Me Find It
I don't know where to go from here It all used to seem so clear I'm finding I can't do this on my own
The next step in life has always been "clear." After elementary school, I went to junior high. After junior high, I went to high school and college. After college, I got a job. There was never a question about the next step--until now. What's next? For the first time in my life, it's not set out before me…
I don't know where to go from here As long as I know that You are near I'm done fighting, I'm finally letting go
Letting go--a seriously difficult but incredible thing. I have no idea what the next step is, but my God does. He has each of my days written in His book, and I can wait patiently on Him. The next step doesn't matter as much as serving, loving, and living with my God.
I will trust in You You've never failed before I will trust in You
He has NEVER failed before. Why would I doubt Him now? My God has brought me through the most difficult times in my life, and I know that I can trust in Him no matter what.
If there's a road I should walk Help me find it if I need to be still Give me peace for the moment Whatever Your will, whatever Your will
"Whatever Your will" has been my prayer. If I'm to stay exactly where I am and continue serving as I am, then I'll be still. If there is something else ahead for me, I'll embrace it with God's help.
Can you help me find it? Can you help me find it?
I'm giving You fear and You give faith I giving you doubt, You give me grace For every step I've never been alone
Yes, I am content. Yes, I know that God's will is good. But, does that mean that I don't have bad days? Does that mean that I don't have moments of doubt? Of course not. However, my God is a God of AMAZING grace, and He is always quick to give me grace when I struggle with fear and doubt. He will never leave me or forsake me.
Even when it hurts, You'll have Your way Even in the valley I will say With every breath, You've never let me go
Sometimes it does hurt. Sometimes there are tears. But, my God is always good and just.
I will wait for You You've never failed before I will wait for You
In God's grace alone, I will wait.
If there's a road I should walk Help me find it if I need to be still Give me peace for the moment Whatever Your will, whatever Your will
Can you help me find it? Can you help me find it?
I lift my empty hands (Come fill me up again) Have Your way my King (I give my all to You)
And as I wait, I will worship and learn and love.
I lift my eyes again (Was blind but now I see) 'Cause You are all I need
If there's a road I should walk Help me find it if I need to be still Give me peace for the moment Whatever Your will, whatever Your will
